Worldwide Church of God: Witte: Go Fishing: Fun with Religion

When you're ready to have some fun with Jesus, check out these links: Gilstrap Jesus of the Week A site dedicated to the most notable images of Jesus. Very funny stuff unless you're an uptight follower. Top Ten Reasons Beer is Better than Jesus Moment of Clarity	"Plastic Jesus" I don't care if it rains or freezes Long as I have my plastic Jesus Riding on the dashboard of my car Through my trials and tribulations And my travels through the nations With my plastic Jesus I'll go far Plastic Jesus, plastic Jesus Riding on the dashboard of my car I'm afraid he'll have to go His magnets ruin my radio And if I have a wreck He'll leave a scar Riding down a thoroughfare With his nose up in the air A wreck may be ahead but he don't mind Trouble coming He don't see He just keeps his eye on me And any other thing that lies behind Plastic Jesus, Plastic Jesus Riding on the dashboard of my car Though the sunshine on His back Make Him peel, chip and crack A little patching keeps Him up to par When pedestrians try to cross I let them know who's boss I never blow the horn or give them warning I ride all over town trying to run them down And it's seldom that they live to see the morning Plastic Jesus, Plastic Jesus Riding on the dashboard of my car His halo fits just right And I use it for a sight And they'll scatter or they'll splatter near and far When I'm in a traffic jam He don't care if I say "damn" I can let all sorts of curses roll Plastic Jesus doesn't hear For he has a plastic ear The man who invented plastic saved my soul Plastic Jesus, Plastic Jesus Riding on the dashboard of my car Once His robe was snowy white Now it isn't quite bright Stained by the smoke of my cigar If I weave around at night And the police think I'm tight They'll never find my bottle though they ask Plastic Jesus shelters me For his head comes off you see He's hollow and I use Him for a flask Plastic Jesus, Plastic Jesus Riding on the dashboard of my car Ride with me and have a dram Of the blood of the Lamb Plastic Jesus is a holy bar. ["Plastic Jesus", circa 1969, sign-on song of disk jockey Don Imis]